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"Life always offers you a second chance, it's called tomorrow...the past cannot be changed, forgotten, edited, or erased...it can only be accepted."

Thursday, April 30, 2015

The advice I will never give my sister

I have had fifteen million ideas for blog posts in the recent days. Not that any of them have come even close to fruition. I actually had a BRILLIANT post in my head while I was trying to fall asleep two nights ago and I realized it was something that I had to write about.

Then I fell asleep...
...and completely forgot it the next day. 

So then I had a new idea. A post about my (no-so) little sister. 

My sister is about a decade younger than I am...and it has made seeing each other a real challenge. Especially after our father died there always seemed to be a real disconnect. I was trying to take care of myself and provide for my household...while she was enjoying school and twirling baton. It's been a hard gap to successfully bridge. 

She recently turned 15 (which is completely insane to me)...and we got together for brunch. Sunday brunch once every month/two months sometimes seems like the only way to see each other. Even when we have days planned...things always seem to come up at the last minute (typically on my part). But about a week ago we got together and ate, and then just hung out for a bit sitting in her driveway as I went to drop her off. 

Rarely does she ask too many questions about our father, and I can't blame her. The saying "ignorance is bliss" was said for a reason...it rings true quite frequently. Especially in stressful situations...and times when things are confusing...it's better to not know. It's better to not have specifics, and sometimes it's better to pretend like what you don't know isn't there. After all, isn't there the whole saying about "what they don't know can't hurt them"?

Anyways...as usual I reminded her during our conversation that if there's anything she ever wants to know...I will tell her. I will be honest, and I will explain anything that she wants to better understand. However I also warned her that there may be things that she will later wish she didn't know...and to tread carefully. 

She was quiet for a moment clearly thinking hard about something and it made me nervous. I didn't want to have to give upsetting information. I didn't want to shatter the good ideas she had about our father.

But what she asked surprised me. 

No dirty details.

No hard questions.

Just one simple request: to take her to the waterfall she had seen in my pictures, where I spread his ashes last year. The waterfall that I grew up traveling to with him.

I thought about trying to schedule a time soon that I could take her...when I realized that it was a Sunday...that neither of us had plans...and considering it's an Ohio spring...it was a lovely day. So I sent her inside for boots and junky clothes.

The next two hours were awesome. We climbed up and down massive cliffs. We tromped around in the river and (I) got soaked. We took pictures, sat on ledges, and just sat around. 

It was a gorgeous day. A day to reconnect, and remember why I really do love being the big sister.

 All we were doing that day was chasing a waterfall. But to us it seemed to be a lot more. 

A waterfall that has seen a lot of history...







And unlike any other girl from the 80's or 90's...
I will never tell my little sister to stop chasing waterfalls.

Friday, April 10, 2015

Pretty much you need to read this...immediately

A friend posted this the other day...and I have a hard time putting into words just how awesome it is. And I'm not sure she even realizes how awesome.



My hard day is Father's Day obviously...but the range of emotions she discusses is spot on. She's clearly better adjusted than I am...as I still struggle with seeing others happy with their parents. But this is certainly a must read for everyone.



Like I said the other day...this ladies and gentlemen...is brave:



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