"Life always offers you a second chance, it's called tomorrow...the past cannot be changed, forgotten, edited, or can only be accepted."

Thursday, November 29, 2012

All things change

It’s been a long time since I posted. I feel like I say that a lot…but things have been very crazy. My best friend and I moved into our new house, I dropped out of school, then re-enrolled. Things have completely changed in the last month. I’m not sure if I ever really dealt with my father’s death…but I did as much as I could. And then I used his death to motivate me to change the things that needed to be changed.
                I’ll get back into stories soon. I have so many things I’ve thought about since he died…experiences that I had forgotten about, but have come back up. Things that I never thought I’d be able to talk about…but somehow this blog has managed to open up.
                I had a long conversation with someone at work the other night. A conversation I never could have anticipated. I shared things that I never tell anyone…and I was perfectly okay with talking about it all. It actually felt good in a way, to get it all out there…and share it with someone that hopefully found some kind of faith in it.
                I don’t currently have internet connected at the new house, but I’m working on it. Once I do I’ll be able to get back to writing more often. But all that matters right now…is I’m still fighting. The last two months have changed everything in my life…and while it all seems kind of the same…I feel like a completely different person. My inner strength has been torn apart. My ability to help others even when I’m falling apart has been challenged. But I got through it. The struggle isn’t over, but it’s going to be okay.
                Sometimes when I look back at the things that I’ve experienced in my life…it scares me a little bit. I start to wonder how I turned out normal at all. Then again maybe I’m not. Ok I’m rambling and starting to overanalyze so I’m ending this post. Normalcy…good topic for future.
                Don’t give up on me…I promise I won’t quit writing.