There
are a lot of things that I’m going to start posting about. Old stories that I
finally have the stability to talk about. They’re stories that will make people
uncomfortable, and writing them down has gotten me thinking about how I kind of
wish I’d kept this blog completely private, even from family. I don’t want to
hurt anyone with these stories…I don’t want people feeling guilty or like there
was anything they could have done to prevent it all. Because quite frankly…that’s
not true. The things that happened in my childhood weren’t anyone’s fault but
the person who the blog is about. He made decisions…and no one could have
prevented them.
I know
certain people in my family did everything they possibly could to get me out of
the bad situations I was in. The fact is…there was nothing more they could do
when the corrupt court system got involved. It’s really hard for me to open up
about all the things that have happened in the past…and part of that is the
risk I take in hurting my family. I kept many of these stories quiet because I
didn’t want to hurt other people. I wanted to protect everyone else. But the
fact is, this blog is about me telling the truth…the whole truth about
everything that happened. I can’t expect to help someone else going through the
same things…if I don’t make it known that these things happened. I’m being a
hypocrite if I preach honesty and openness…but am holding things back myself.
I want
everyone to really think before they continue reading this blog. I’m going to
give it a little bit of time before I post the stories…maybe a few days. And I
really need anyone who reads to think a lot about if they can handle reading
it. I’m finally at the point where I can talk about it all, but it’s still
incredibly hard. I can’t handle hurting other people too.
I know
everyone who loves me did everything they possibly could in the situations we
were all in. But there was a very mentally sick person trying to foil their
efforts, and a court system that was less than helpful. Again, it is NO one’s
fault except for the person who actually did the horrible things. I don’t blame
myself, and I most certainly don’t blame anyone but him. If anything, I am
unbelievably grateful for the people who were there to help. They all saved my
life more than they realize now. I consider myself one of the lucky ones. It
could have been worse. I could be in a MUCH worse place than I am…but I’m not
because of the good people in my life who fought for me.
So
again please…think hard before reading anymore on this blog. It’s about to get
extremely honest, and I’m going to share a lot more than I ever have.
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